So, what’s on the agenda for today, Cyrus? I’m glad you asked, audience. After updating this blog I will be finding some way to practice my makeup. Like, you know, I promised myself I would. Then why update your blog first, Cy? Well, it takes, what, two weeks of doing something consistently for it to become a habit? Something like that. At any rate, blogging daily hasn’t become a habit yet. So expect many random, meaningless posts until it does.

Though I do really need to get on that makeup thing. Like… right now.

I’m so lazy some days it ought to be fined.

And would you have thought that I barely own a single article of feminine clothing? Always when you need it…

Thought for the day: Why can’t we stop intelligent people from doing stupid things?

All right. I’m going. I’ve talked to myself on the internet enough. I can do that shit in the mirror. I shall return later with pictures. Until then, audience, I remain…

Your most adored,
C.N. Faust

Late Night (Early Morning) Adventures and Musings

It is way too late for me to be up posting like this. I even hoped that I might be logged out of my WordPress account, therefore presenting logging in as too much trouble and not worth the effort. No such luck. My browser brought me straight to this page. Dem efficiency. 

As to why I am up at 2:40 in the morning, skyping my fiancee and tweeting almost my entire train of thought (you know, like normal people do, I’m sure), I have no clue. I’m just really restless. My legs hurt like crazy and I can’t seem to lie down for long periods of time without shifting uncomfortably. So I may as well have something to stare. If it can’t be the back of my eyelids, it’s going to be a well-lit screen capable of presenting amusing images for my pleasure. 

So, I had an interesting day today at work. First of all, it was incredibly slow. It’s the end of the month, everyone’s EBT has run out and the cash money spent on heroin and Wild Turkey. So you could have probably had a picnic and a nape between each individual customer. At some point, some well-meaning (I presumed well-meaning, from his non-threatening appearance despite generic white shirt and sagging dark pants) chap walked in and started talking. At least, I think he was trying to form words. It was more along the lines of … 

Chap: *mumble mumble mumble* SHE *mumble* PHONE *mumble mumble* PICTURE? 

Me, decidedly confused and wracking my brain for the “Cyrus to Real World” translator that I keep stashed somewhere in there, parried with the devastatingly clever “?”. 

Chap: *mumble mumble* MAY I BORROW *mumble* PICTURE.

After a few more moments of meticulous translation, we finally deciphered that he was asking me to take a picture of him, his little girl, and his wife/girlfriend. The little girl was really really cute. She even gave me a hug and thanked me for ‘everything’ before it was all over. I wanted to die of a cute overdose. I’m sure it was one of the happiest moments of my life. Though snapping pictures of a family unit that you do not know, on a tiny camera the basics of which you can only presume you know having handled similar technology before, in 100+ weather with people who do not understand the concept of proper lighting can be a real challenge. 

But valiant, gentlemanly integrity thrived strongly in the end. It was a rather decent day at work, all in all, and I think I should pick up shorter shifts more often. I tend to stay in a better mood that way. 

I have promised myself that I am GOING to work on the makeup tomorrow. And I am GOING to promise YOU (my loyal readers, all two of you) that I am going to post pictures to this blog. See? Now I’ve made a promise (two, actually) and I have to keep it (them). I cannot break a promise. I cannot. Or said valiant gentlemanly integrity will have all been for naught. 


This probably won’t be a very long update at all. I am off to have coffee with my darling friend Cheyenne and then I am off to work and who knows what I will feel like updating then.

I went to bed last night feeling like the epitome of masculinity. I just knew that when I woke up I was going to bind, put an effort into what I wore, and play the part of the gentleman all day. I woke up this morning and the only thing I felt like was a zombie who miraculously didn’t give a shit.

This always happens to me.

In other news, I have made me promise myself that I will work on the makeup for the photoshoot tonight, just to be sure I actually know what I’m doing. No excuses, this will be it… (fat chance)…Marius is the one that puzzles me MOST, honestly. I’m not very well-versed in working with reds. Goddamn you, Marius, you and your superior taste in colour.

Also, don’t you love it when Pandora seems to get halfway through some random song and then switches over? It’s almost like they realized it wasn’t supposed to be there but played enough before they switched it so you wouldn’t notice, you would just think that the sixties had unnaturally short jams.

Well, that is my random thought for the day. Maybe not the day, but the morning, sure. If you are extra special, you may get an update later. But until then, I remain….

Your most sincere,
-C.N. Faust

Vampire Chronicles Photoshoot (part 1)

So did you know that Robert Pattinson and Kristen Steward broke up? 

I don’t really care, but I thought you might. 


It’s been a pretty productive day as far as some things go and a really unproductive day as far as many things go. But regardless, I enjoyed it. Although judging from the vomiting motions my stomach has felt like making the past few hours I would venture to say that it did not enjoy the day as much as I did. I’m not sure why that is, yet. Stay posted for pictures of vomit and a possible death certificate. 

We have a photoshoot this weekend. And by “we” I mean my fabulous photographer friend Ashland Joyner and I. If you have not checked out her fabulous photography by now, you are clearly un-American and you hate the queen of England. 

But back to the photoshoot. It’s going to be fabulous. We’ve wanted to combine our forces and do one before, and half-planned it once or twice, but this one looks like it is really going to follow through. It is Vampire Chronicles themed, and I’m doing the makeup (naturally). I’ve been having a ton of fun brainstorming, but if truth be told I’ve spent way more time working on some more than others. But I have until Sunday to fill in the gaps, right, right? That’s the way it works in theory, anyway.

I’ll be sure to post the pictures once they come through. I might even snap a few of my own as we progress. Anyway, I’ll be sure to keep you updated. 

First Real Post

Salutations. Originally this blog was simply for promotional purposes, but in lieu of my recent departure from Facebook (or soon to be departure) I decided to convert it into something a bit more personal so that family and friends don’t feel like they have fallen entirely out of touch.

And many have been puzzling over my and Mark’s decision to call it quits. Well, to be honest, it all boils down to the fact that I just wanted to. I am not so foolish as to deny being made a slave to social media- in addition to blogs I also have Twitter, and such. But with Facebook I was beginning to feel more and more violated. Nothing was new to me or anyone anymore. I had almost no control of what got out to whom and how. Facebook also proved to be a bottomless well of unnecessary drama. Bred, I believe, by the fact that there is nothing really to do on Facebook other than peruse other pages and get the intimate, delicious bits of people’s lives that manage to slip out. And need I bring up the thousand countless arguments that no one can win that always happen anyway. Some positives even turned out to be negatives. It is so easy to keep up with family members, but I increasingly felt like that since I could follow their lives on FB they felt less of a need to communicate with me personally.

So maybe putting myself ‘out of the loop’ will put me out of touch with many, but I feel like taking an extra step to stay in touch with someone (text, email, phone call, any alley that initiates actual conversation) will actually strengthen some relationships. Facebook, I think, creates dangerous illusions about who is really your friend, blowing petty arguments and differences way out of proportion.

So there you it. My decision… and its reasons. Any thoughts to share? Drop me a comment. I love you all. Until the next blog post I remain…

Your most loyal,
C. N. Faust